Allrighty. Here we go. I have always found that using my voice has been difficult. It was not something I was encouraged to use. I was told to shut-up a lot while growing up so I think my fear of communicating comes from there. And even now, after much work, I still feel as though I don't have the right to have an opinion, or that no one cares about what I think. The truth is though that I AM DYING to tell my truth and I know that someone out there (if not just myself) will benefit from me telling my story.
I am in the process of learning to love myself. I think the lack of self-love is a wide-spread epidemic in our society. That, unfortunately, my story is extremely common. That there are more people in the world who are experiencing a lack of self-love than there are people who are experiencing an abundance of it. And I believe we can blatantly see this as we look around in our society. In the way we treat the planet, the animals and our general lack of awareness.
What I have learned in my many years of therapy, reading/listening to personal development books, visiting various energy healers, countless yoga sessions, hours of meditation, hypnosis, NLP and coaching is that WE create our reality. And that reality is based on a set of beliefs learned in childhood which we carry with us, until we choose to change them. I believe this is extremely liberating. This means that we can shift from a victim mentality to being the CREATOR of our lives. I mean it gives me goosebumps, but it also means that in order to get to that point a LOT of inner-work and healing needs to be done. You have to go through the pain again, which can be too much sometimes, but it is so worth it when you get to the other side.
I grew up with an alcoholic parent who began sexually abusing me at a young age. I still have a hard time being open with this because of fear from other family members. But what happened to me is true, and I will not be silent anymore. I can't be. Being silent would be saying that what happened to me is OK. Which is the last thing it is.
A lot of abuse and dysfunction starts in the home, and it then continues into the external world. If we could be brave enough to voice our traumas, to say, "this isn't ok and I am not going to be a part of it," "I am going to create something new, even if I lose everything and everyone I am comfortable with," I mean, could you imagine the world we could create?
One of my favourite people EVER is Louise Hay. I started reading and listening to her books several years ago and she gave me a completely new way to see the world. She inspired me to take action and create a life I wanted to live. I thought, "If she can go through what she did, and come out the other side loving herself and helping others, then I can too."
So, I am going to start documenting my journey in the hopes that I might inspire or help another find their way back to themselves. Cheers to us, and to many years of abundance, love, and happiness.